Tag Archives: Children

The Hope of Parents for Their Children

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As a parent my greatest desire is to see my son grow up loving, honoring, and serving the Lord. We read the Bible and pray together almost every night. We take him to church a couple of times a week. We try to explain to him that the way we treat others is a direct reflection of our relationship with God. We want him to understand the difference between cultural morality and living out the Christian life. We want to teach him that his life is to be lived as a demonstration of his love for God.

We are prayerfully seeking God’s wisdom to raise our son up in the ways of the Lord; however, there is no guarantee he will obey or continue in these teachings. As a pastor I have seen too many parents broken because of the choices of their children. They were godly parents and yet somewhere along the way their children departed from the godly path.

Because of this, parents often ask me about Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” They feel like they held up their end by raising the child the right way,  but now that same son or daughter wants nothing to do with God, Jesus, or the church. These parents just want to know what they did wrong or if there is anything they can do to fix the situation.

This morning I found a few insightful thoughts on D.A. Carson’s blog in regard to this verse. Dr. Carson writes: “The proverb ‘Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it’ (Prov. 22:6) is so well known that it cries out for comment. Recall that a proverb is neither case law nor unqualified promise (review meditation for March 23). When children go wrong, very often the careful observer can spot familial reasons that have contributed to the rebellion. But this is not always the case. Sometimes young people from evidently wonderful families kick the traces. Some return years later; some never do. Good families may produce prodigal sons. This proverb must not be treated as if it were a promise that fails periodically. Rather, it is a proverb: it tells how God has structured reality, and what we should do to conform to it. This is the principle of how families work; it includes no footnotes and mentions no exceptions.”

As parents we are going to make mistakes in raising our children. However, if we strive to honor God in the raising of our kids, if we set the Word, the commands, and ways of God before them, and if we try to be a living example of all we teach then we can rest knowing that we did our best. There comes a time when our kids must choose which path they will take. Yes it is heartbreaking when they make terrible choices, but as their parents we will still have opportunities to use our authority to influence them in the right direction. But in the end they must choose which path of life to follow.

Regardless of the age of our kids, there are few ways we can continue to train them up in the ways of the Lord. First, pray for them. Pray for their wisdom, holiness, and even conviction of sin. We can also lovingly and gently offer advice. If they are receptive, sit down with them and share your concerns. And finally, love them. My past is littered with mistakes the I believe greatly disappointed my parents; however, I always knew they loved me. It was their reflecting the unconditional love of God that helped lead me to repentance and a godly Christ-like life.

So parents do your part in putting children on the right course. Then entrust them into the hands of God knowing that He will never give up on drawing them to Himself.

A Jesus Storybook for Teaching Children

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One of the greatest challenges as a parent is finding just the right Bible to use in teaching our children about God’s love. Many of the books out there tend to make the Bible sound like a mythical fairytale, while others are nothing but a rule book to follow so God will love you. Sitting down together as a family to study the Bible, discuss the lesson, and then pray together is one of the most important things we can do as… Continue reading →

Give Thanks With a Grateful Heart (Part 4)

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Yesterday I shared that I began praying for my wife when I was sixteen years old.  At that same time I began praying for my future son. I remember my prayers were for a healthy child that would grow to love the Lord and become a Christian at an early age.  As time went on I began to pray for a young man who wouldn’t make the same mistakes I had.  I prayed that he wouldn’t shipwreck his faith, abandon the church, or live a life caring only for himself.

In 1985 Christian artist Wayne Watson recorded a song that forever changed the way I prayed for my future wife and son.  The song was “Somewhere in World,” and talked about a father praying for a godly wife for his son.  As I listened to the song, my prayers for William grew to include his future wife.  Even though I was only twenty, I knew that I needed to keep praying for my son. 

In 2001 Shirley and I were told we wouldn’t be able to have children without God’s intervention. We never experienced a miscarriage or the loss of a child, but I remember hurting more that day than any other in my life. As word spread through the church, many of our friends stopped by to pray with us, cry with us, and encourage us.  My parents came over that evening and I will never forget what my mom said, “Bobby, you have been praying for your kids for over twenty years.  God knows what is best and His timing is perfect. You trust Him and everything will work out just fine.” Those words of faith continued to ring in my ears for the days, weeks, months, and even years to come. Then came June 2004 when they rang loud and clear as the nurse said to us, “Mr. and Mrs. Pittenger, you have a healthy baby boy!”  After twenty-four years, God answered my prayer.

Now over seven years later, I still find myself not only praying for my son but also thanking God for blessing me with a child.  I am so grateful for God’s wonderful gift. There are so many things I never understood about God’s love me until after William was born. I never knew watching a child grow could teach me about God’s love for His creation. I am over-joyed when he is so excited that I have come home from work.  I am broken when we’ve spent the whole day together, he looks up at me and says, “Dad, wasn’t this a great day getting to be together without any interruptions!” I am humbled when I see him trying so hard to be “just like daddy.” And I am thankful that he has a hunger to learn about Jesus and His Word.  When I think how my boy energizes my heart I wonder how my longing for a loving relationship with God affects His heart.

So, this Thanksgiving season I am thankful to Almighty God who gave to me the wonderful gift of a son.  I pray that I will be equal to the task to raise him in the ways of the Lord and that he will never turn from those ways as I once did.  I pray that the little girl who will one day become his bride will come to know Jesus and pursue Him with all her heart.

Give Thanks With a Grateful Heart (Part 2)

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Yesterday I shared with you how grateful I am for my LOBC church family.  Today, I want to talk about the two people who mean the world to me—my parents.

As far back as I can remember my parents have been teaching me about Jesus. Every evening we would turn off the T.V. and have a family time of Bible study and prayer.  They simply sat us down and read the Bible with my brother, sister, and I.  They made sure we understood that God’s love for us would never end and that He would meet all our needs.  After Bible study, we would say our prayers together.  My parents didn’t make us learn prayers that sounded all “churchy.”  They told us just to talk honestly to God sharing our needs, fears, concerns, but mostly to thank, praise, and worship Him.

Another lesson they taught me was responsibility.  I had chores that were my responsibility, and if I didn’t do them, they wouldn’t get done.  I was to complete my chores in the proper amount of time and with the right kind of attitude.  Trust me, it never paid to complain about my chores (I’ll let you figure out what happened when I complained).  My chores were also to be done to the best of my ability.  I was never allowed to do a job half-way.  In today’s standards all this may sound harsh, but they taught me lessons I am still applying today.  Everyday I try to do my best at my job; taking a sick day doesn’t happen unless I just can’t get out of bed.  I believe that my work is a direct reflection of my character, so I want everyone to know me by the work I do.  Besides, one of the Bible verses my parents taught me was Colossians 3:17, “Whatever you do in word or deed, do it as to the Lord Jesus.”  If I am working for Him, He knows when I am slacking off!

I also learned about commitment from watching my parents.  They have been married for forty-eight years.  They made a commitment to God to love each other no matter what, and they have stuck with it.  They have had lots of difficulties throughout the years, but they never gave up.  Through financial struggles, sickness, family loss, crippling injuries, and even getting older they have managed to stay together and still love each other in spite of the difficulties.  Their commitment even stretched to them fulfilling a promise—they never backed out of a promise.  No matter how difficult, they always kept their word.

The greatest lesson I learned from my parents is to just be myself.  Mom and Dad never tried to act like someone they weren’t.  They have always been down-to-earth and were never ashamed of who they were.  They never looked down on others because they had less, nor did they envy others who had more.  They were always happy for those who were blessed with more and were willing to help those who had less.  They taught me that it is okay to be Bob Pittenger.

So today, I want to honor my mom and dad.  I am so thankful that in God’s divine plan He allowed me to be the son of Bob and Geri Pittenger!  Mom and Dad I love you and want to thank you for everything you have taught me over the years!

God and the “Age of Accountability”

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Recently, I was visiting with a few parents of infants and smaller children about the topic “Age of Accountability.”  For obvious reasons they were concerned about where their little ones would go should the unspeakable happen.  As  parent of a seven-year-old, I have spent a great deal of time in the Bible looking for answers.

I firmly believe that any answer to this question must start with God.  The Bible makes it clear, God is love and desires that all people be saved (admit their sin, believe Jesus died and rose again for their forgiveness, and commit their lives to Him).  A God who goes to such great lengths to make a way to save all who will believe would have made a way for those who die before birth or at an early age to know Him.

In the following video John Piper does a wonderful job of explaining His Scriptural view of the Age of Accountability.  By no means does this excuse us as parents from teaching our children to commit their lives to Jesus and live for Him, but it does help us knowing that God cares for the little children, and they are under His watch-care.  Let me know how you enjoyed the video.